© Roman Milert - Fotolia.com

I’m in the process of forming groups for my new workshop “Writing for Clarity,” which will focus on tuning into your intuition through writing exercises, determining your desires, and putting them into action through activating intentions. The group is designed to be supportive and create synergy through sharing.  Register now on the Life Gardeners website.

The “Desire into Action – Tuning Into Love” Workshop at Morning Mist Retreats was a tremendous success. Thank you to all who attended – you made it a success! Not only did everyone have fun, we were able to put techniques into action during the workshop. My favorite activity (besides the kazoo “feel good” activity) was Reframing. One of the participants volunteered to share the worksheet with the group & we had a little mini-coaching session right there. Then everyone broke into pairs to share their experience with the exercise. So, with the success of one workshop, I’m ready to delve into more!

We still have room in “Let the Good Vibes Roll – Using the Law of Attraction,” which will be held at Gayatri Healing Center (check out the new website – my first “professional” web design project).  We will cover some of the same material as “Desire into Action – Tuning into Love,” but with a focus on all areas of life. This is an introduction to using the Law of Attraction that will be just as fun as the May 15th workshop, but with an emphasis on using the 5 Steps in every area of your life (health, prosperity, relationships, career). Register now before it fills up!

Today’s article about Michael Wolf and Mahalene Louis, two Austin spiritual teachers and coaches, describes a “missing step” in setting intentions. This step is about “listening” to our inner guidance (higher self, God, etc.) before setting our intentions.

When I spoke with Galen on Wednesday, I expressed to him my desire to meld the understanding I’ve gained about co-creating from the teachings of Carloline Myss with the LOA material I learned from my mentor, Margaret McCraw. What I didn’t know is that he would be writing an article that answers my desire and perfectly expresses what is necessary in order to co-create with spiritual integrity.

I look forward to reading more from Galen and learning about the work of other practitioners in the Austin area. You can read the article here.

Barbara Kelly, MSW, MLC, presents
Margaret McCraw’s “Tune Into Love: Attract Romance through the Power of Vibrational Matching”

Barbara Kelly, MSW, MLC, brings her skill as a therapist and practitioner of Margaret McCraw’s “Tune Into Love” techniques to help you attract fulfilling relationships using the Law of Attraction as seen in the movie The Secret.

Benefits:
Improve existing relationships or attract relationships that work
Find out how to move past blocks
Discover that forgiveness is huge
Demystify meditation or prayer

Experience the four steps to attracting the relationship you desire:
Feel-good moments
Creating a wish list of desires
Setting intentions
Releasing the outcome

Margaret McCraw’s “Tune Into Love: Attract Romance through the Power of Vibrational Matching,” is available for $10.17 (optional).

Register now: retreat limited to 15 people

Barbara Kelly, MSW, MLC, received her Law of Attraction Life Coach Certification through Behavioral Healthcare Consulting with Dr. Margaret McCraw, author of “Tune into Love.” Her Life Coaching practice integrates her therapeutic background with the Law of Attraction to assist clients in reaching their full potential personally and professionally.  http://barbthelifecoach.com

When:    Saturday, May 15, 2010, 10:30 am – 3 pm (lunch included)
Where:    5013 Sendero Springs Drive, Round Rock, TX  78681
Cost:         $6 for lunch. Optional Tune Into Love book for $10.17.
Contact us:     Call 512-255-0075 and send $6 plus $10.17 if you want the book to:
Morning Mist Retreats, 16508 Colwyn Bay Cove, Pflugerville, TX  78660.
What to Bring:  A comfortable pillow to sit on, comfortable clothes, journal and pen.

Morning Mist Retreats is a Texas non-profit organization dedicated to providing retreats that are spiritual, experiential, culturally diverse, and affordable. Our goal is to provide transformative, fulfilling experiences. See www.morningmistretreats.org.

For more information contact Karen Beard, Director, at (512) 255-0075 or karenlynnk2000@yahoo.com

© Paul Hill - Fotolia.com

Anger, Fear, and Resentment prevent us from moving forward in our lives. Forgiveness of ourselves and others is critical if we are to create the lives we desire. Over the next few days, I’m going to explore some of the reasons we feel these negative emotions and ways of finding forgiveness.

Boundary violations
A boundary violation occurs when another person invades our private or emotional space without our consent. This includes egregious violations such as rape, child abuse, assault and murder. It also includes verbal abuse, harsh criticism, and exposure through telling secrets or sharing intimate photographs. We can also violate our own boundaries by sharing too much too soon in a relationship, giving into demands that don’t honor our values, or going along with others to appear “nice.”

When we don’t have good boundaries, we may find ourselves saying “yes” when we don’t want to. Usually this is due to a fear. Common fears include fear of abandonment, fear of being alone, fear of the other person’s anger, or fear of retribution. If you are feeling angry about being abused, criticized or taken advantage of, you are being called to pay better attention to your own boundaries. Learning to say “no,” is self-protective and will help you determine what it is you want and don’t want.

As you reclaim your power to define boundaries, you can move towards forgiveness. Forgiveness may come in the form of taking a “meta-view.” In the case of abuse, you learn empathy for others who have been abused. You also learn to value yourself and to avoid people who are abusive. These are valuable lessons that may not have been learned without having experienced abuse.
When we feel anger and resentment about a boundary violation, we need to ask ourselves the question, “what can I learn from this?” Being angry doesn’t accomplish anything, but we CAN take action. By actively examining the situation, we can find ways to grow through even the most difficult violations. Forgiving someone who abused or assaulted us may be difficult, but it is important to do so for OURSELVES.

Usually people who oversteps boundaries have poor boundaries themselves. They do not understand that what they have done is “wrong.” Forgiveness does not mean inviting the person into our lives to sit at the dinner table; it only means we let it go. We let go so we can move on. We remember what it feels like to be violated and do our best to be aware of our boundaries and the boundaries of others. By doing this, we turn a difficult situation into a positive learning experience. It is possible we may even find ourselves thanking that person (not necessarily face-to-face) for helping us develop strength and empathy.

It IS possible to support yourself on less than 40 hours a week. This is exactly what I did from 2001-2005. In 2001, I left my job at Supportkids.com because it wasn’t allowing me enough time with my children (no, the irony of the name does not escape me!). Between 40+ hours at the job locating noncustodial parents who hadn’t paid child support in years, the 45-minute commute both ways, and picking my children up at daycare, I found myself frazzled and missing my children. I took what seemed a radical step and quit the job to start a cleaning company. What relief! I found out that I could command a better per hour rate and only work 30 hours a week. Daycare went away (as did the over $600/month bill) and I was able to spend the afternoons cooking, gardening, and helping the girls with homework.

What Timothy Ferris proposes is a more radical shift. This shift includes outsourcing tasks to others, developing a system of passive income, and living “on the go” by spending time in other countries where the cost-of-living is cheaper and the dollar stretches more. While I am intrigued and excited by his ideas, I am still tied to the hour = payment model; however, I’m moving more towards the 4-Hour Workweek and appreciate the help provided by his book.

Even if you aren’t ready to quit your day job, Ferris has tips that will help you move towards more freedom in your work and personal life. Many of the “free” workshops and webinars, as well as the many subscription services available are based on this book and Napoleon Hill’s  “Think and Grow Rich”.  If you like to read, save yourself some money and purchase these books. The tips for success are proven and well-thought out. Ferris’s book, in particular, offers many resources for freeing yourself to do the things that excite you. The time you spend with your family and pursuing your dreams is well worth the $22.00 cover price. For the frugal, try finding a copy on half.com or at your local used bookstore. For those of you who can’t wait to read it, click on the link below.

© Albix - Fotolia.com

So often, when I speak with someone who is divorced, the word “failure” comes up. We have been taught by religion, our families, and our culture that divorce is a failure of commitment. The following stories illustrate the transformative power of divorce. Whether you are the person who instigated the break up or the person who wanted to maintain the marriage bond, divorce can be a liberating and creative experience, a chance to become more authentic and define your desires in new and startling ways.

First off, I want to explain that up until 1999, I saw divorce as a failure of moral character. My parents divorced in 1975 and for many years I defined my life by that moment – the moment I lost daily access to my father. I laid the blame squarely at the feet of my mother, who bore the weight of my anger for the next 25 years. It was my own divorce in 2000, as well as the divorces of several of my friends, that gave me my first glimpse of the transformation that can occur during the process.

In 1998, my then-husband stood me up for a rare date to see a friend’s photography exhibit. That night I looked at him and told him I wanted a divorce. I was exhausted by the energy I spent keeping up the front of a functional marriage. The nights I spent wondering whether he was coming home, where he was, if he was with someone else or just having a night on the town with his buddies, were wearing me down. He asked me to stick it out with him and I did, for two more years, until the effort to keep myself under wraps in order to maintain the marriage became more than I could stand. When I left him, I left not only his family, but my history. We had been together for almost 15 years, 9 of them married. The breaking point came as I reawakened to myself. The interests he labeled “crazy,” were the interests that brought me joy. No longer was I willing to subject my spiritual leanings to scientific and logical arguments. No longer would I apologize or hide the intensity of my astrological studies. No longer would I apologize for working on the family history or making dolls for our daughters. I wanted to be around supportive people – people who “got me.” My “failure” to maintain the commitment brought me closer to empathy for my parents, which later became forgiveness. If we cannot forgive ourselves, how can we truly forgive others?

During this time, two friends ended their marriages due to an unwillingness to continue hiding their sexuality. As a friend of all four of the people involved, I witnessed not only the joy and guilt of the partners who were embracing their homosexuality, but the anger and bitterness of their spouses, who felt betrayed. During the darkest hours, it seemed as if the abandoned spouses would never be able to get over the betrayal and have a healthy relationship. Over time, both families have reached workable solutions. Family holidays are spent together – former spouses, current partners, extended family, friends, and children. One friend has shared her joy at going from being married to a half-husband to having two husbands! Her ex-husband’s partner fixes her computer, gives thoughtful gifts and helps with the children. In the meantime, she’s pursued her art with the support and encouragement of both men. In hindsight, the partners who left did not abandon their partners or themselves (which would be the outcome of staying in their marriages). As a result, everyone has grown due to the experience.

In another example, a close friend’s husband left her for a younger woman. For the first year, she attempted to save her marriage, courting her husband and working to understand his point-of-view. It didn’t succeed, and they were divorced. After many tears and long talks on her porch, she revealed the dreams she had put off. She had always wanted to be a nurse,and began to explore the idea of following that dream. Over the next five years, she finished a nursing program and is currently employed as an R.N. Additionally, she now cannot fathom being with her ex-husband, who was not a nurturing or warm presence in her life. His departure was a gift because she learned her own strength and followed her desires. She found a well of strength she was unaware of until she had to stand on her own.

None of this is to say that divorce is easy. For those of us who leave, we are occasionally plagued with guilt or doubts about the decision. Sometimes the pain of being alone can be so great, that we wonder if settling might not have been a better choice. I do know the opinion we have of the situation can help us overcome the doubt, fear and anger. I now see my marriage and my divorce as positive events in my life. I’m able to look back at the highs and the lows and cherish the whole package. With my ex-husband, I had an ally in the world. We shared friends, political views, and a lifestyle. We supported each other through the deaths of five grandparents and two close friends. We gave life to two interesting and interested daughters, who continue to amaze us. When I left him, I learned that I could support myself and follow my own path. I went dancing, reconnected with friends, started my own business and went back to graduate school. The very interests that pushed us apart, brought me fulfillment. I’m not sure what he thinks about it now; but from my perspective, he seems happy. He has a wife who shares his interests and he has left behind the days of escaping into a six-pack. Today he teaches meditation classes, travels, and is a supportive co-parent to our children.

© Sergey Rusakov - Fotolia.com

By re-framing divorce, we can come to a new understanding about who we are and what we want from life and our relationships. If you or someone you know is going through a divorce or breakup, Life Gardeners can help you re-frame the situation, identify your desires, and attract the life you choose to live. Pain is inevitable, but we choose whether we will suffer or learn through the experience. Are you ready to transform your life? Visit www.lifegardeners.com today.

How do you get that smile going? Your best tool is your imagination! Daydreaming and putting your thoughts towards your desires will give you that feeling boost you need for a big, heartfelt smile. A friend recently was having difficulty finding a job. Instead of encouraging her to talk about the problems with the economy, I asked her what the perfect job looked like. She imagined a job as a nanny with a family that appreciated her. She also imagined having healthcare benefits and time to pursue her writing and painting. When we’d get together, I’d keep her talking about how great her life would be when she got that perfect job. She was offered another position that didn’t have benefits, but gave her an opportunity to work with children. Within one week of starting, she was offered a nanny position with benefits that pays well enough to meet her bills and also leaves plenty of time for her artistic pursuits. Once she had this position in place, she told me that her next desire is to meet someone and have children. I told her about another friend who met her mate while working as a nanny. Now she is a stay-at-home mom with a loving husband and a beautiful daughter. My friend is now focusing on that desire and I’m already wondering what I’ll get her for her wedding gift when the day arrives.

We all have the power to manifest our desires in this lifetime. In future blogs I’ll tie the teachings of Abraham-Hicks and the Law of Attraction to the teachings of major religions and occult sciences. The Laws that rule the our lives are universal and can be found in all faiths and sciences. If you want to begin putting the Law of Attraction to use, you can visit my website, www.lifegardeners.com, and schedule a coaching session. Coaching can be conducted over the phone or in person. Smile! The life you love is waiting for you to embrace it!